You n me !!

How do I explain how much I love you!

You meant everything to me and no matter what happened I always adored you!!
Its hard to fathom that you can never be with me!
I could wait all life long for you to think and see!
But to see your heart and mind somewhere else takes me by a storm!
For me you were my priority n could do anything to keep you happy but  only if you really wanted me to be!
To think that of the first and the only person I loved I  wouldn't be able to catch a glimpse gives me sleepless nights!
And to ever think of anybody else gives me fright!
And then I wonder when dis wasn't meant to be why did all this happen!
Was it a punishment so that with tears my eyes get dampened!
All this time day in and day out you were the only thing about which I kept thinking!
What will I do how will I move ahead  my mind gets no answer And my stupid heart isn't ready to sink this fact in!
To not have you around for me is no pleasure!
Bt had to give up for I knew that not me but something else is wt you treasure!
Don't think I hurt you because I am the one to suffer!
Trust me when I say that my life is filled with dismay and I  am blank and heartbroken n not a bluffer!
I am extremely sorry to expect or complain to you now I have realized that I was at fault!
I would be stupid to blame because you were not for it from the start!
But unfortunately my mind bought tickets to the end of rainbow!
No matter what I do my feelings are not willing to go!
Your importance for me will never change , for me you were before u will always be.
Trust me through thick and thin if you really need help you just have to stretch your hand and you will find me
I really don't know what is in your mind bt what keeps you happy is with you n thats what I could understand!
Then what else could I have done though it wasn't easy to let go bt  that is all that came to my mind!
Don't think that I left coz I didn't care!
Had I not felt guilty why would I leave when I knew that I have nobody with whom I can share!
It feels bad when you keep saying that I did wrong to you ,
Because if you think I am selfish it isn't true !
I am myself in agony and an unending dispair but had it not been for a reason why would I leave!
I might be wrong but the intention has always been to keep you happy n please understand my stance n forgive me to you I plead !!!

My past ...

In the memories we have created,
There is magic in the past
For better or worse
I never thought it would last.
Sooner or far felt like a lonely flower
Within minutes but strange after an hour
I felt a light in your words and felt was talkin to star.
After talking to you my past wasn't depressed
This feelin was different from the rest.
I was disillusioned as why to say good bye ,
There seemed feeling of sorrow,
Becoz wasn't there to see u tomorrow.
I cannot understand what celestial being is in command.
You look beautiful, 

My senses were sent to remand !

I am in my room thinking I have this feeling for a while now ,
I can't put my finger on u but yet it feels wow.
I dunno you
But yet something is there ,
Hardly I know , but why I felt u near .
My thoughts were loud ,
My past became bright
With ur words around , let off my fright
You were steady , you were right
Still dunno where I was suppose to hide .
You can count on me to be there for you
Know it's strange but yet it's TRUE.
When we were young ,
We could not drive
But just talking to you made me so alive .
I prayed to God that if I ran all the way ,
That God would make u my friend SOMEDAY  ....